thisismylife | [Video; Backdated to June17th]

[Video; Backdated to June17th]

[The video feed opens up with Artemis settling into place, looking more subdued than usual and a little sheepish at doing this at all.]

Uh, so. I sort of... owe some of you an apology for my actions over the past few weeks. I know I've been acting... well, out of the ordinary is probably a gross understatement, but I think that's... I think that's all been resolved now. I just wanted to say... sorry. Mostly to people I might have upset or hurt by things I said or did. So. I'm sorry. I'll, uh. I'll make it up to you, if I can.

And to everyone else, uh. Just ignore the girl making an idiot of herself over here. Thanks.

[The video feed clicks quickly off again after that, although Artemis will still be reachable via the journals or to anyone who wants to swing by the apartment.]

[Video; filtered to her floormates on as high a security feed as she can manage.]
[A moment after she finishes the previous transmission, she sends out a second one to her teammates she shares the floor with. The others from her world who'll understand the news she's got to tell them. The secret she wants to get off the chest, so what happened over the last few weeks won't be something that continually hangs over her head like some threatening dark cloud.]

Uhh, look, I owe you guys an explanation and I'm sorry I wasn't up front with this from the start, but I spent so much time hiding it back home that it's... it's almost a habit at this point. But I don't want to lie and I'm tired of always having to keep who I am a secret and it just made everything else these past few weeks all the worse, because it was something that could be used against me. That's happened before and I'm tired of it. I don't want it happening again.

Zatanna knows this already. She was there when I told my team. It took me a long time to be able to trust them with it. Too long, to be honest, and it was all my insecurities that made me keep it quiet as long as I did.

My story from back home, the one that I sort of maintained here, was that I'm Green Arrow's niece. His protege. From Star City. That's not true. It's a story that Batman and Arrow came up with to keep my identity safe when they recruited me for the team.

My name is Artemis Crock. I'm from Gotham. My mother was Huntress, an ex-con. The rest of my family... aren't even ex. My sister Jade goes by Cheshire. My dad... He's known as Sportsmaster.

[She hesitates a moment, taking a breath, because it's no easier admitting it a second time around, to a second team. Once had been bad enough.]

I was raised to join with them, but I made a different choice. Left that behind. And my efforts were apparently enough to get me noticed, earn me a place on my team back home. And I worked hard to deserve it. I still do. But it's still... something that hangs over you. And the whole shard thing sort of... blew all those old insecurities and fears out of proportion all over again.

So I'm sorry. Sorry for not telling you all earlier. Sorry for being a pain in the ass these past few weeks. I'll understand if this changes how you see me, or if you don't really want me to be part of the team after this. But... I wanted to let you know.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Well, since they agreed on avoiding the completely depressing topic...]

Then we'll have to change that. Besides, it's not like you've got a schedule bursting with activity. You can at least give it a try.

Besides...maybe you'll find something to impress one of the boys.

[Artemis rolls her eyes.] Yeah, because that's at the top of my list right now. Pretty sure I've mortified myself enough for one month, Z.

Edited 2013-07-14 20:25 (UTC)

And what makes you think that you're going to mortify yourself? I know it isn't your looks. [And Artemis better not think that either, since they do have mirrors in the apartment.]

I just don't think I'm the sort that's going to impress the boys. [That was neutral enough.]

What? Since when? [Nope, she's not letting this go.]

Since always. Pretty sure they don't think of me like that. And besides, there's... [Wally. She wasn't sure what to do about that.]

Right. Because the guys are really open and honest with what they're feeling.

[That cut off sentence gets her interest though, and Zatanna leans closer.] There's what?

I don't think even Luceti can do anything to help that.

[Artemis's tone is dry at that, but she shrugs at Zatanna's question, before asking one of her own.]

Is it weird? Having this thing for Robin, I mean. When he's... not the same one from home?

I don’t know. They could make us all tell the truth. Not that I’m wishing for that to happen. [Because there are secrets Zatanna doesn’t exactly want to share with the population at large either. She just thinks it could happen.

The question catches her off guard though, and her eyes widen a bit in surprise before she leans back against the couch.]

I don’t know. Maybe sometimes. {Zatanna stirs around her now half-melted ice cream.] It’s not like I think he’s our Robin or anything. I mean, if he were, then this wouldn’t be half as crazy as it is. [Because Zatanna’s pretty sure that whatever had been happening back home had been mutual. In Luceti—hell if she knows.]

Edited 2013-07-15 23:31 (UTC)

[She makes a face.] Ugh. Me either. That would probably turn out to be a nightmare. There are just some things I'd rather not know.

It's just... it's hard to keep it separate sometimes. There and here. I mean, we have lives back there. Friends. [And this whatever it was she and Wally had been dancing about for weeks.] And here....

And can you imagine the aftermath? Not only what we don’t want to know, but what people don’t want to say. [Zatanna thinks about it for a moment, then grins.] Although I wouldn’t mind learning Robin’s real name.

[Zatanna nods, shifting to put her feet on the edge of the couch so she can draw her knees up to her chest.] Here is here. And it’s not supposed to count. But it’s not like we aren’t living it, right? I mean, even if we won’t remember, we’re here now.

[Artemis opens her mouth and closes it again, giving her a sympathetic look, because crap, now what does she do?] You'd probably have better luck getting it out of Batman. Wally said he's the one that forbid Rob from giving it.

[She takes another bite of her melting ice cream, finishing off the bowl.]I know. And hell, I've been here for a couple months now. I just... I don't know how far to let things go here, when back home is still there waiting for us.

[Yeah, no. That's not the look of someone who's just joking.] Wait a minute...do you know his name? How do you know his name?

[Man, talk about not fair. Artemis better be glad Zatanna likes her.]

It's hard. But we're not supposed to remember anything from here, right? And we show up at the same moment when we left, so it's like we were never gone. [Zatanna shrugs a shoulder, thinking about it.] I think it's okay to have some fun, and it's not like any of the boys are probably looking for more than that either. Especially not Robin, who tries to avoid fun like the plague.

I... [Artemis winces and crap. Crap crap crap.] ...don't?

Yeah but it'd be just my luck to think about starting something here and then Wally shows up. Which would be good and bad and... Oh, I don't know.

You really were never cut out to be a supervillain. You can’t lie at all. [Which really isn’t a bad thing, but it doesn’t answer Zatanna’s question. There’s really not that many ways for Artemis to have found out, and knowing that the girl next to her knows but she doesn’t makes her feel—not so great.

But that isn’t Artemis’s fault. So Zatanna just looks down for a moment before she perks up again. Moving on.]

That’s a lot to wait for. I mean, Wally may never show up, or he might be from even earlier than you are…he may not even know you. [Not that Zatanna wants any of those things to happen, but it’s something she has to point out.] You really must like him a lot.

I can. When I want to. Which I... don't really. I just... It was an accident and there was a fight and I'll tell you, I will, I just... should probably give him a head's up before I do. Because really. It's a little ridiculous here. Especially since we forget everything if we go back. And there's no one here who knows him except us. And we're his teammates.

[And it just didn't make a whole lot of sense, really.] Maybe I should tell him Batman forbid it. Then he'd want to do the exact opposite.

[Artemis makes a face at that. Ugh.] Wow. That was so not encouraging. At all. But... yeah. You're right. And I... It's Wally. I... yeah, a bit. Not like we actually had a chance to figure out what was going on and all, but it still feels... weird, you know? Like it's dishonest if I start thinking about other people. Even though we never... really came out and admitted anything. Why is this so confusing?

No, it's okay. [Zatanna lets out a slow sigh, shaking her head.] I kind of don't want you to tell me. I mean, sure, I want to know, but--I don't know. It'd be nice if he actually let me in on it out of trust. Which is way too much to ask and is never going to happen--wow. I really know how to pick 'em, huh?

[Because falling for a guy who won't even tell you his name? Yeah. Zatanna's feeling like a real winner right now.]

Sorry. [Not helped by Artemis pointing out just how blunt all that truth was. But she listens, then drops her head back against the sofa.] Heck if I know. But I blame the guys. All of them. This has to be their fault, right?

Well, if he does, you're ahead of me. [Artemis rolls her eyes.] Jason actually let it slip by accident and Rob completely freaked on him. But who knows? Maybe he will.

[She laughs softly and nudges her shoulder against Zatanna's, sympathetic and equally frustrated.] Blaming them sounds good. Let's go with that.

Oh? [Okay, maybe hearing that makes her feel a little better. Not much, but a little.] Yeah, maybe. But I'm not going to hold my breath.

[At least one of them can laugh. Zatanna grins a bit, and quickly nods her head.] It's official. Boys are more trouble than we're worth.

[She turns her head to look over at Artemis.] You know, I really didn't mean for this to get all depressing.

[She snickers, shooting Zatanna a sideways glance in wry amusement.]

It's boys. Besides, I thought that was what the ice cream was for.

Actually, the ice cream was supposed to be a reward for that post you made. I know it couldn't have been easy for you.

Easier than freaking out and running away on missions every day. [Artemis scoffs quietly and glances sideways at her friend.] Probably easier for the rest of you, too. Besides, I don't want to give anyone something like that to use against me again. Even if it's... me using it against me.

True. [Hey, Zatanna's definitely not a fan of the whole run away on missions thing, so it's pretty easy to agree.] But still. I thought it deserved a treat.

Thanks for that. [Artemis gives her a crooked grin.] And for everything else. Sorry I was a bit of an ass about everything.

Hey, it's not like you wanted to be. Supernatural influences: believe me, I get it. So I'd say we're good.

[Video; Backdated to June17th]

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